I have a new obsession. Not that I needed one more thing to distract me from work, my friends, my workouts, and my blog; but my new compulsion is a dirty little itch I can’t stop scratching. I try to stop myself, knowing I should ration it, stretch it out, make it last, but I just can’t stop myself. It’s like drugs.
That obsession is of course the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy and let me tell you something: you need these books in your life. Just google the title and you’ll see that people are going apeshit over these books. They’ve been dubbed “mommy porn” but don’t let that dissuade you. Unless suburban mommies around the globe have been hanging around here on Nasty Fridays, these books are way hotter than anything they’ve experienced. Even a certified perv such as myself has had to put the books down and rub one out on many an occasion. These books take smut to a whole nother level.
But while the sheer hawtness of the books alone is reason enough to cop them, there is another, more interesting aspect to the stories that I find really compelling. Without giving too much of the story away, the books centre around a couple with a dark side. The woman – young, naive, and inexperienced – falls for the man who is powerful, domineering, and heavily in to BDSM. This makes not only for some seriously panty-soaking sex scenes, but also for an endless power struggle between the two of them.
What distinguishes the books from regular garden-variety porn (which – don’t get me wrong – is a beautiful thing) is how the theme of possession and domination manifests not only in their bedroom (and playroom, but you’ll have to read the books to find out more about that) but throughout their life. The man seeks to control, possess, and dominate his woman in every aspect of her life and her struggle to find a middle ground between being the submissive partner he wants and being a self-actualized person in her own right is really interesting.
See as far as I can tell, there are three types of women in the world: those who refuse to be controlled, possessed, or dominated by their man in any way shape or form (aka single women), those who say they want it but chafe against possession the minute it interrupts her plans, and those who are able to submit to their men without having an existential crisis about it.
Most women think they’re #3 when they’re actually #2. That’s where I am, and that’s where homegirl in the book is a lot of the time. And from observing her struggle in the books, I wonder whether it’s even possible in this day and age for any woman to succeed at being fully possessed. It’s all well and good for a man to tell you your pussy belongs to him and he can do what he wants with it, but what about your wardrobe? Your social circle? Your career? Your name?
To hear mr. man in the book tell it, everything about his woman belongs to him. He has the final say in every aspect of her life. And her punishment for defying him is swift, often brutal, and fucking hot. When I read the books, I find myself shaking my head at her perpetual disobedience. Unlike most men, he makes his expectations crystal clear, so why doesn’t she just do what the fuck he says? But I know from my own experience that it’s easier said than done.
Or maybe she just disobeys him because his punishments always involve blindfolds, handcuffs, and earth-shattering orgasms. I can get with that.
Whether you want to possess your woman or be possessed by your man or not, these books are definitely worth checking out. Worst case scenario, you get some food for thought about what the ideal relationship dynamic should be. Best case, you get that and some very pleasant throbbing in your nether regions.
But what do you guys think? Have any of you read the books? Did it make you want to hand someone a riding crop and encourage them to go to town, or were you horrified by the perversion? How does the theme of possessing or being possessed manifest in your relationships? Speak on it in the comments.