Your Favourite Male Bloggers in Bed (Calling Out Names)
I don't consider myself an e-groupie. I don't aspire to bone the men behind the blogs I so enjoy. With one exception. Okay two. No - three. But that's neither here nor there. I get enough offers in the 3D world to keep my coffers full, so you're unlikely to catch me buying a plane ticket to travel for some blogger ass.
All the same though, with all the talking we do on the e-streets about relationships and sex, is it any wonder that I spend at least a little of my time thinking about the men who get my minds open on a regular basis? Well the single ones that is. I forbid myself from spending too much time thinking about the ones with wives or wifeys lest I feel compelled to line-step. You guys already know how I am.
So yeah. When I see a new avatar or catch a racy tweet, can you blame me if my mind starts to wander? It’s only natural that I spend a fair amount of time wondering what some of my favourite male bloggers are like in bed. And I’m a pretty insightful person so I think I have a pretty good idea about which of them would put it on me so good I want to call him Mr. Max.
For instance, I think Wis‘s dick is like drugs. He’s the one who can half-step his way through fucking you and still have you scratching at his door begging for more. Because he is the one who makes you feel like he loves you when he fucks you. He fucks you dirty but respectfully. Makes an effort not to fall asleep instantly afterward. Holds you close and tells you nice things that are just close enough to the truth for you to believe them.
I think Sam Sharpe is the one who fucks you slow, fucks you long. It takes hours and you feel wrung out when it’s over. He’s the one who will do everything you expected but in a way you never imagined. He’ll talk to you at first to get you warmed up, but once the action starts he shuts up and gets down to business and the only noise you’re gonna hear is your own sharp gasp and then low moans so deep they’re like growls. He’s the one that leaves you flung out over your bed, chest heaving, panting oh. my. GOD!
Now Tunde is the one who makes you scream his name. Not just because you want to, but because he tells you to. He’s the one that can fuck you slow and soft but quicker than you know what’s happening will flip your ass over and pound into you from the back like a battering ram and you love the surprise as much as you love the sensation. He’s the one that will do everything to you and you won’t even have to ask. The one who won’t stop until you’re satisfied.
Lincoln is the one that will have you wide open before he lays a hand on you. He’s the one that wants to look at you. Just look. From every angle. He’ll study you with a dispassionate expression on his face, touch you neutrally, impersonally, until you’re panting and dripping with anticipation. Linc is the one who will fuck you in ways you didn’t know were legal. The one for whom it’s true when you say “no one ever did that to me before”. He’s the one that leaves an imprint on you after he fucks you; has you shuddering with post-sex aftershocks for the rest of the week.
And then there is my favourite, Dr J. Now the good doctor is the one you pull out the stops for. He’s the one you want to impress. He’s the one that will blow your mind without breaking a sweat. He’s the man that will blindfold you, tie you up, make your heart race in fear. The one that will literally rip your panties off you and fuck every thought of how much they cost right out of your mind. He’s the one that will hurt you, fuck you til your moans turn to sobs. He’s the one that will push you hard over your boundaries, make you do things you don’t want to admit you did. But you loved it and you’ll try to train every man you fuck after him to do it like he does. But they can’t.
I know you guys spend your fair share of time thinking about what your e-peeps are like in bed. It’s Friday so overshare your thoughts in the comments. And you know we bloggers are nothing if not narcissists, so please feel free to speculate about what you think I’m like.