At any given time in a single woman's life, she has at least three dudes who would love to smash. There's probably one that stays sniffing at her crotches even though he hasn't a chance in hell, or a new dude who's just waiting for a chance to put a hurting on her,or maybe an ex that hopes he can still bone.
Now the thing about the Homey Who Would Smash is that he comes in two varieties. The good version of this guy wants to blow her back out, knows he can’t because of her history, and so he stays the hell away from her. He respects his friend and respects the rule of the game and most importantly, he recognizes that the flesh is weak. He knows this is the ultimate grimy move and so he’s not going to let himself come within sniffing distance of this chick lest he get a whiff of her ladyflower and lose his fucking mind. That’s the good version of this dude and he is a rare creature indeed.
The bad version of the Homey Who Would Smash is another story altogether. This guy kinda respects his friend and acknowledges the rules of the game while simultaneously trying to beat them. He knows that smashing his homey’s girl is a grimy move and he just does not want to admit that he’s a grimy guy. So instead of being direct and making a move, he will flirt with her. He’ll suggest outings and then later flop the show. He’ll give her the eye, touch her gratuitously, and pay her big compliments that have her grinning for weeks to come. This dude will put in work to make sure the gal knows he what’s on his mind in the hopes that she is grimy enough to to suggest a stealth smash.
Now the truly bitchass version of the Homey Who Would Smash is going to jump at the first opportunity to bone when it’s suggested to him. His excuse is “She came on to me! What was I supposed to do?”; leaving out of course all the ways in which he lead the horse to the water. This dude is beneath contempt and I’m not going to waste any more keystrokes on him. The more common version of this dude will hold out a bit longer. He’s gonna keep up the cycle of being suggestive and turning the woman down until the sexual tension between them reaches the critical mass at which no one can really fault him for caving in. I mean, there’s only so many times a straight man can turn down pussy before he caves under the pressure. Everybody knows that.
Whenever a man brings up the Man Code in a conversation about boning me I know instantly that he’s ripe for the picking and looking for a reason to believe. A man who truly doesn’t want to cross the line will never let a woman know he’s thinking about crossing it. But the ones who habitually line step and then fling out the Man Code like a shield at the last possible moment? Those guys are full of shit. Catch them in the right situation with enough backs turned and that man will be parting your ovaries quicker than you can say “I’m a shitty friend”.
So ladies, when your ex’s friend tells you that you and he could never be because he cannot violate the Man Code, think of this post and smile in victory because you now know for certain that sooner or later he’s gonna cave.
This is my theory anyway, what do you guys think? Do you share my opinion that a man who brings up the Man Code is just waiting for the opportunity to break it? Men – if you’re really not trying to smash your homey’s ex do you avoid her like the plague or do you flirt and grope her until she’s begging for it? Ladies have you ever encountered this kind of grime? How did you handle it? Speak on it in the comments.
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