What I Should Have Given Up for Lent

2009-02-lent-big

 

What did your favourite blogger give up? Painting my nails.

Every single person I’ve told about my Lenten sacrifice has asked me if I was insane. And while I can’t fault them for thinking that, the truth is that what I am more than insane is lazy and a procrastinator. Because at like 8 o’clock on Ash Wednesday I was scrambling to come up with a sacrifice and couldn’t come up with anything that makes sense. I thought about giving up the word fuck. But I’m about to go on vacation with my girls and Cheekie loves hearing me say that and it didn’t seem fair for her to pay the price for my Catholicism. Then I thought about giving up Saltines because they are so bad for me but my food intake is already so limited that it didn’t seem smart to restrict it further. I briefly considered giving up sex but quickly remembered that I’m about to go on vacation and might participate some “what happens in DC stays in DC” activities I turn into a raging bitch when I’m celibate so…the only thing that I could come up with that would really be a sacrifice was masturbating.

Did anyone ever tell you that the devil is busy? If you didn’t believe it before, you should now. Because let me tell you the moment – the moment! I decided to give up polishing my silver that motherfucker has thrown the most provocative, most alluring, most moving stimulus to tempt me into slipping a hand into my panties and dealing with the case right quick.  Get thee behind me Satan!

But I’ve been standing strong except for one slip up. But it was after a particularly hot text message exchange and you guys know I’m a sucker for dirty talk and plus Cheekie told me that I can just tack on an extra day at the end and God won’t mind. I know I’ll get through the next 32 days or so. But I also know for next year and every year thereafter that I will never give up my most favourite pass-time up for Lent again. Ever. And in order to avoid scrambling for ideas next time around, I’ve been making a list of some shit that would have been a way better idea to give up for Lent:

1. Buying nail polish

In addition to not painting my nails, I’m not really painting my nails much either these days. But that didn’t stop me from buying three bottles of Essie in 0.3 seconds on the weekend. For my male readers out there, that’s about $30 bucks that I dropped on some shit that I will use twice and then throw in my nail polish drawer with the other 150 bottles that I never use.  I tend to rotate between 2 or 3 colours on my fingers and I only ever wear one colour on my toes, so all this polish I’m buying is a problem.

2. Actually, shopping in general

I hate shopping, but I do it a lot. I’m no Rebecca Bloomwood, but I have been averaging one new pair of shoes per week for the last little while and that is probably a teeny tiny bit excessive. It might not have been the worst idea in the world for me to take a break on shopping and give me a chance to wear the 5 blazers I’ve purchased in the last four weeks before I go back and buy more.

5. Flirting

You know what I realized the other day? I have a flirting problem. It’s not that I don’t know how to speak to a man if I’m not flirting with him so much as that it’s just way funner to flirt. So I do. A lot and with just about everybody. And you know what happens after that? Everyone from the bike courier who delivers to my building to the dude who butters my toast in the morning thinks he has a shot at sniffing my hydrangea. It gets to be a bit much after a while. Maybe easing off the flirting might lead to some more meaningful conversations. But probably not.

6. Tumblr

Did you guys know that Tumblr is drugs? That shit is drugs! You have your smutty sites like Slim and Busty(very NSFW) and then your porn-esque sites like Love’s Other Trumpet (very very NSFW) that are like instaporn. And then you have my girl @paddez whose tumblr is filled with all kinds of beautiful and wonderful things and then the next thing you know I’ve wasted 45 minutes of my life posting shit to mine. I would be so great if only I’d never discovered Tumblr.

But what about you guys? Did you give anything up for Lent? Do you regret it? What do you guys think I should give up next year? Speak on it in the comments.

bag lady. digital nerd. beauty junkie. shoe whore. i'm a sucker for big words and box-fresh kicks. know a little bit about a lot of things and have something to say about everything.

Comments 22

  1. I gave up alcohol and dairy for lent. And you know, I’ve worked damn near 12 hour days everyday since I gave it up. I walk in the house looking for a bottle of vino to calm my nerves after being stuck in traffic, or being stuck in the grocery store because some fool decided to take a cart full of stuff through the self-checkout. smh. But, after that initial moment, it passes. As for dairy, I can do without it. I don’t drink milk, and I barely ate cheese, so I’m good. But the alcohol has been tougher than I thought it would.

  2. Cheekie says:

    You know how funny shit has you “HOWLING”, Max? You including the my made-up bullshit well-intended addendum to the Lent rule had me doing just that. Just now. As I’m typing this.

    Also, if I had ANY idea your next choice woulda been nail-painting I would’ve highly considered easing up on the f-bomb. Girl, you are a saint lol. Still glad to be able to hear Max uncensored next week! ;)

    Oh, and this wannabe gave up fried foods for Lent. Going okay so far, though I am CRAVING French Fries…

  3. Drew-Shane says:

    I just gave up dark soda. I think next year I’m going to do something that’s going to be a challenge for me. I also added a routine of doing 200 crunches and 20 push ups day on top of my regular work out. Somethings I just know I can’t live without but I think that’s the point…

  4. René says:

    I actually gave up flirting this lent thinking it’ll be an easy thing. Believe me, it’s not. It has made me realise that’s what breaks the ice between me and new friends/acquintances. Sad as it may sound.

  5. Malik says:

    And the first thing that came up at Love’s Other Trumpet were beads and cross, just after reading about Lent here. I couldn’t think of anything to give up for Lent so I’m just going to have to skip being Catholic for this season.

    Sidenote-How do we get an avatar up for when we post here?

  6. Mrs.Brightside says:

    Max I’m going to pray for you. My junior year in college I had trouble sleeping and painting my nails was the only thing that would relax me enough to be able to lay still. I wouldn’t make it. Next year just give up shopping. It will hurt but while you aren’t shopping you can paint your nails; which is a free activity.

    As a wannabe I gave up potatoes for Lent. It’s turning out to be a horribly great idea. Potatoes are my comfort food. I love potatoes in any form. I had one slip up when a friend and I ordered a queso dip that came with potato chips. Wasn’t thinking. Potatoes are very filling but not all that healthy so it’s adding to my diet and work out plan well. I just don’t like being restricted. More power to you Max.

  7. funms says:

    I tried giving up twitter but after the first day, i couldn’t stay off……yup i’m an addict….well in my defense, i am a wannabe so i really have no obligation to give it up :)

  8. Menelaus says:

    I’m not Catholic and can’t understand why a non-practicing Catholic would ever give up anything for Lent. Just seems stupid to me. People don’t even know why they give up stuff for Lent. So I just smile and say what’s up…

    1. Malik says:

      You do know that other denominations outside of Catholicism practice Lent as well? Lent is largely only coupled with Catholicism because of the resurrection of Christ is focused on more heavily here there than in the other denominations.

    2. max says:

      No matter how much of a lapsed Catholic I am – and these days I’m not as lapsed as I once was – I don’t think I could ever not give up something for Lent. I’ve been doing it since I was a girl and it would feel completely wrong not to. Some things you can just never lapse out of. Like midnight mass.

  9. Danielle says:

    I really don’t consider myself a Christian. I grew up in Anglican which is just a spin off of Catholicism. If forced to attended either services my mind instantly drifts off to who I want to have sex with, I want run up there and deck the priest, pull the fire alarm–anything to stop that man from talking. Christianity has never really soothed my soul. But I am a self proclaimed Religion Vampire. I love soaking up the feeling I get when I am around any true religious person. There are so happy! It’s awesome. That’s about as far as I go. Seriously, I am way too much a self-gratifying sensualist to give up anything unless a doctor tells me to.

  10. LaLaBakir says:

    I was supposed to be giving up cursing. That didn’t last too long. I failed.

  11. BGirl says:

    I was supposed to give up secular media, which is a pretty tall order. I obviously didn’t follow through with that but, maybe I’ll try something else next year if God doesn’t smite me before then.

    More power to ya! You can do it! and all those other motivational phrases.

  12. sanen85 says:

    I’m just gonna go ahead and say I gave up sex, since I basically did.

  13. streetztalk says:

    I gave up cursing. I do it too freely, so I did that.

    Junk Food and Fried food, I dont eat it enough to do so.

  14. Reecie says:

    uhm Max. send your nail polish to me. you know I’m a fiend. okthanxbye.

  15. Diggame says:

    I actually gave up one of my favrote things…liquor! No crown and cokes at all! Its been agony for me too but I figure that was the only way to push myself is take away one of my most cherished vices

  16. Sam Sharpe says:

    No way in hell I could give up tumblr. Are you kidding? That shit is a lifesaver. Tumblr is what you get when you mix crack, chocolate, the internet and magic.

    God I love tumblr.

  17. Anetra says:

    I gave up Twitter COLD TURKEY! I happened to see something really stupid and annoying on Fat Tuesday and decided THAT’S ENOUGH! I also gave up cursing but I slipped today. Good luck!

  18. C.J. says:

    I gave up Chicken and Turkey…which is a feat b/c I don’t eat Beef or Pork so I’m pretty much living the vegetarian life. I gave up drink juice, beer and alcohol so I’m just drink water…which is a problem b/c I hate water. I just don’t drink it. I’d rather dehydrate than drink it…UGH! and I gave up having sex by default. The person that I’m involved with gave it up and since they are the only person I get it in with, I get put on hold too…. Lawd keep me near the cross….

  19. chief78 says:

    I’ve been reading your blog for a few months after finding you through the comments on Until I Get Married. I must say, I’m addicted to it now. This is my first post though. As far as Lent, I love the idea, though I grew up baptist and have never practiced, so I didn’t give up anything. Wow, at this post though! I never knew of that side of tumblr lol; thx for all the links. I play around with photography/photoshop a little and started a lil photoblog of my pictures and have found it very inspirational as far as art and looking at images people post. Anyway, ck out my stuff sometime; nothing freaky, but just some cool shots. Great blog, keep it up.

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