I Just Don’t Give a F*ck

27
Jan
2011
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For a reason that I can no longer recall (but I attribute to my feverish, delirious state) last night I was dicking around on YouTube and came across this video: It tickled me because it reminded me so much of myself. When I was growing up I always got in trouble from my mum for [...]


For a reason that I can no longer recall (but I attribute to my feverish, delirious state) last night I was dicking around on YouTube and came across this video:

It tickled me because it reminded me so much of myself. When I was growing up I always got in trouble from my mum for my “blase” attitude. I’m just not good at getting worked up about things that I don’t consider worth it. And of course my standards of what is worth getting worked up over are vastly different than the rest of the world’s. But here’s a sampling of some things I just don’t give a fuck about

1. Money

I like money but it doesn’t rule me. When I have it I enjoy it and if I don’t I assume it’s on its way back to me. In fact that’s the only thing I retained from watching The Secret back when it was all the rage – money flows freely and easily. If my essentials – cell phone, internet, food, shelter, transit fare, books, shoes, clothing, accessories, and mad money – are taken care of, I’m good. I am definitely more of a “I want to die owing a million dollars” kind of person. Which is good because at the rate I’m going I probably will.

2. Celebrities

Is Lindsay Lohan on drugs again? I don’t give a fuck. Did OJ kill Nicole? Yeah could not care less. Oh Alicia stole Swizz from what’s her face? Yeah – and? I don’t think I could be any less interested in the personal lives of celebrities.

8. Typos in gchat

I consider gchat to be a punctuation, capitalization, grammar, and spelling-free zone. When the convo is flowing freely I don’t always take time to hit the shift and I don’t expect anyone to do so either. I already know that everyone in my contact list is literate. They don’t have to prove it to me in our chats.

3. The opinions of people I don’t know, won’t meet, don’t like and am not fuckin’

Thank my twitter lover @WisdomIsMisery for this one. But I couldn’t have said it better myself. The people whose opinions matter to me are the ones who sign my paycheque or brought me into this world. Everyone else can eat a dick.

5. Wayward friends

Last year two girlfriends who I would have called close magically disappeared from my life. I made one attempt to contact them to have a grownup discussion and after that? No more fucks for you. I’m not sure anyone is going to feel me on this one but friends drift in and if they can just drift out like that then they were probably shitty friends in the first place.

6. Music videos

I need everyone in the entire world to stop sending me links to videos. Stop asking me if I’ve seen them. Stop telling me I should watch them and why. I do not give a fuck about Kanye’s girlfriend who is a bird but he didn’t notice she was a bird. Honestly the only reason I watched that shit was because of the epicness of Selita Ebanks’ titties in her bird costume. Beyond that – I will listen to a video online if I don’t own the song but I have no interest in watching them and I think my life is pretty complete without them.

7. Nature and Animals

I know this probably officially makes me a bad person but…yeah I don’t think your dog is cute. I really don’t want it to touch me and if it gets too close I will probably kick it. I’m unmoved by the changing colours of the leaves in autumn and I will not be wasting one moment of my next trip to Washington looking at cherry blossoms. No sir.

And that’s my list. What do you guys think? Should I give a f*ck about any of this? What don’t you give a f*ck about?


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30 Comments

  • Cheekie says:

    First off, I am IN LOVE with Kain Carter. Ok, now that I got that outta the way…

    “8. Typos in gchat”

    THANK YOU. L BOOGIE.

    “No more fucks for you.”

    Time to use this in my everyday life! Said in Soup Nazi voice.

    “I will not be wasting one moment of my next trip to Washington looking at cherry blossoms.”

    !!!

    *dies laughing*

  • dude in the video is hilarious. he’s from bmore. he has about 25 more videos and they are all equally funny.

    great list. i concur on all of them except animals. i’m a dog lover. except for greyhounds. i hate those ugly dogs with a passion.

    to add to my list i would include:

    rumors- for some reason my name always seems to come up out the mouth of someone i could give two shits about. and its always seems to be attached to something that just isn’t true. i learned a long time ago to not worry about what people have to say about me.

  • My Kryptonite says “if you’re not feeding me, financing me, or effin me.. then I don’t care..
    Since 2 out of 3 apply to me, then he makes sure he stays on my good side…

    I could give two effs about celebrities either.. I’ll thumb the magazine to see what clothes are looking cute, but other than that.. I ain’t got that kinda time..

    I barely get my grammar and spelling right even though I know it properly.. my misspelling is all over twitter.. and last time i was in gchat, Webster would’ve been ashamed.. yep, don’t care about that..

    I miss Kain Carter.. “who tha eff are YUU!?!” can’t watch him with no sound..
    I love nature.. but i’m an outdoorsy chick, so that’s my ish…

  • Danielle says:

    The only thing I disagree with is Nature and Animals. I live my leaves changing and listening to the birds chirping until one of cats catch ‘em and brings them in the house. Dead.
    I never really could give a fuck about anyone’s opinion of me and I like to do what I do which is why the Navy didn’t work for me.

  • M says:

    Nature sucks, the end. That’s why everyone is out here trying to get a house instead of living in the damn forest with “nature.” Nature is the one leaving all this damn snow outside *exhales* everything else, I agree with. Although I do find the lives of celebrities entertaining when I’m bored. I just don’t understand when you have access to so much & still remain so…ignorant, for lack of a better word. Makes me chuckle…

  • Shani says:

    Word!! I feel ya! I share the same “I don’t giva a F***” attitude about alot of things too, and usually get told how callous and uncaring I am… oh well! I agreed w/ you on pretty much everything accept the nature part lol call me a herb but I dig the changing leaves of autum. Other than that.. Who the eff cares??

  • Shani says:

    Word!! I feel ya! I share the same “I don’t giva a F***” attitude about alot of things too, and usually get told how callous and uncaring I am… oh well! I agreed w/ you on pretty much everything accept the nature part lol call me a herb but I dig the changing leaves of autum. Other than that.. Who the eff cares??

  • Andrea says:

    “. . . yeah I don’t think your dog is cute. I really don’t want it to touch me and if it gets too close I will probably kick it.” Ha ha! This line made my morning. Thanks, Max!

  • I love this guy’s videos. lol. Too Funny!

    I agree with all except nature and animals. I love nature, and animals in nature. Dogs would be fine if their owners understood the importance of personal space, and didn’t think everyone else should give a damb about their stupid dog,

  • 5. I couldn’t agree more. If the friend is meant to be in your life, they will stick around. Then there are those friends who you don’t need to see or talk to on the regular. My best friend in the world lives across the country and is busy all the time, but when we do talk it’s like our last conversation was just the day before.

    7. I can’t stand nature or animals. I’m allergic to both, so I don’t want to hear about flowers, trees, dogs, cats or wildlife unless someone is warning me to stay away or take benadryl.

  • sanen85 says:

    I came here last night and all that was up was the video and was worried that I’d never get an explanation as to why you posted it. I’m glad to see there was more :) .

    1. Yep, exactly my philosophy.

    2. I don’t really care about any of that either, yet somehow always end up knowing about it despite never seeking the information out.

    8 (3). I knew Cheekie would agree with this one. I don’t care about others punctuation and spelling, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say it gets me a little to see my typos.

    5. Been there, done that. I also don’t have a single f*ck to give on this subject.

    6. Remember when folks used to record (on the VCR) music videos (I know several people who still DVR that ish)? I’ve never given a sh*t about videos, and still don’t. Yep, still haven’t seen anything from Kanye since Through the Wire. *shrugs* Actually, I did see the Zach Galifinakis parody of the Power, funny sh*t.

    7. I don’t give a donkey’s ball about nature, but most animals can melt my heart. However, if I can’t stand the owner, it’s likely I won’t give a sh*t about the owner.

  • LaLaBakir says:

    I don’t give a fuck about people calling me mean. I’m not. You clearly must be behaving a manner where I feel the need to shut you down. If you tell me I’m mean, I may ask why are you talking to me then or I will reply “And?”

    I don’t give a fuck about sports. I don’t care. I haven’t watched a b-ball game since the NBA lockout when I was in high school. I hated them for that. And it lives on,lol. This is not to say that I don’t enjoy a good game, but I’m not keeping stats and shit.

    I can’t c/s the nature, but I can w/ the animals. I’m not an animal person. I don’t understand how the levees broke and people were worried about their dogs. As I grow as a person, I’m becoming more compassionate towards animals…but I don’t think I’ll ever own one.

    C/s wayward friends

    • max says:

      “I don’t understand how the levees broke and people were worried about their dogs.”

      Yes, this. To me there has to be a point where you say “it’s just a dog”.

  • streetztalk says:

    good post

    I dont care about celebrities lifestyles and how they pertain to kids. celebs shouldnt be role models period. Parents should be, word to Charles Barkley.

    cosign with ur list except the animals n shit lol

  • Eddie:Brock says:

    I do not give a fuck about Kanye’s girlfriend who is a bird but he didn’t notice she was a bird.

    ^OMFG! Had to walk away for a second…LOLing too hard.
    C/S 6. My cable stays on 406 [old school hip-hop] for background music. I have no idea “who’s hot in the streets” right now and seriously don’t care. There’s another blog i frequent where the Yeezy love gets a little to thick for me sometimes [*coughVSB*cough] and many times i don’t get the references because I don’t any of his, Drake’s or Lil Wayne’s music.

    Good post….

  • Adonis says:

    As I said yesterday, my family thinks I don’t give a f*** and I should give more f***

    The main I stress about is love & women… and even that wavers from time to time

    Everything else is just window dressing…

    #ThatIsAll

  • I meant to comment earlier but I was at work. I just want to say I’m honored to be a part of this blog. That is all.

  • Monet says:

    Number 7 was a personal favorite!

  • davidruffin83 says:

    I just don’t give a f*ck in general. And while it drives my mother insane it works well for me. No strokes on the horizon for me dawg!! Yeah I’m an ass. So what? I like me and if you don’t it just means there’s something wrong with you!

  • Yikes.. I give just about all the f*cks..

    Not really.. Just wanted to say that..

  • Yvette says:

    Wow max thank you i was having a bad morning but hey am all cheered up now well my list
    - i couldnt care less about what peeps think about me: gosh u dont feed me, u dont pay my bills, u dont f***me so why should i even mention you (ishsssssssss, african sound of annoyance lol)
    -oh and well whats hot in the street i dont even have a TV ( well i read a lot and i spend way too much time on the internet lol)
    As for nature well i live in Africa so like it or not at some point u have to give a f***lol

  • Snipps says:

    If its not payin my bills or eatin my p***y, I dont give a f*ck. I agree wit all of the above + #8… ppls funny lookin, sticky, bad ass kids

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