On any given day you will find me on gchat with one or more of my e-girlfriends. And while our conversation topics range from the mundane to the truly ratched, at some point of every conversation we are going to start talking about a blogging boy.
The blogging boys are the men of our favourite blogs and in a lot of ways they are like the cornerstone of the relationship between me and my friends. We all met either in the comment sections of their blogs or in a chat room
while drooling over them during a ustream in which a few of them were featured. Officially they are the link that brought us all together and so we pay homage to them every chance we get.
Unofficially though, these boys are ruining our effing lives.
A few months ago I wrote a love letter to these boys thanking them for being so smart and funny and insightful and arming us for the battle of the sexes. And I meant that, but the thing is that there is something a little…obnoxious about these men. Not in the typical sense of the word, but just in that it all gets to be a bit much after a while. Back in the days before they started showing their faces we gals could take comfort in the fact that – while they may be smart and funny – these guys must look like roadkill. But now that they have all removed the proverbial masks and revealed their faces and we have discovered there’s not a homely one of them it all just seems so unfair. And you know what the worst part about it is? They have the nerve to be so nice. I mean, these men are out there living their lives, doing their jobs, writing their posts and catching their e-panties and still have time to make a joke with you, give gchat advice, retweet your blog post, or compliment a new avatar.
Honestly if I didn’t like them so much I’d line them all up and kick them in their effing faces.
These blogging boys and all their charms make life difficult for their fans. It is an extremely heady thing to be able to rely on a man to put careful thought into expressing himself on a daily basis. Even when they’re talking pure shit and refusing to pay for plane tickets, the very fact that we can set our watches by them is hawt. Is it any wonder then that some gals tend to get inordinately attached to them?
Trouble #1 with male bloggers is that they tend to bring out the worst in their female fans. There are so few of them and so many of us and we all know what happens when a large group of women become fixated on a small group of men right? Half the women are so determined to show themselves in a favourable light that they will fudge, obfuscate, or outright lie in their comments; which defeats the purpose of leaving one in the first place. This then causes the other half of the women to lace their comments with low-key shots against the panty throwers. And there we have it: the deadly combination of thirst and hate.
Of course the thirstier the thirsty girls act the more the hating girls hate until there are more offline conversations about the commenters than anything else. It’s a feeding frenzy of grown women acting like there’s a fire sale at the 12-inch cock store.
The other trouble with blogging boys? They really do ruin all other men for us. They’re just so much more interesting and evolved than the ingrates we interact with in the three-dimensional world. Stacked up against the f’in man and the VSB‘s and SBM‘s of the world…what do any of us want with some mere mortal who can barely string together a declarative sentence? Between our fantasies and a couple of them in our gchat contact lists we’re able to piece together a pretty solid love life; throw in a couple sex toys and we need never deal with a “real” man again.
No one swoons for a male blogger more than I, but sometimes I wish I never found these guys. Life was much simpler when I lacked a frame of reference.
But what do you guys think? Ladies do you feel the same way? Men do e-ladies make you less inclined to deal with real life women? Speak on it in the comments.