In all the years that I was with my first love, I don’t think I ever rode his dick. I have no idea what the reasoning for this was, but I can only assume it was some silly girl combination of “I don’t know what to do” and “I don’t want him to see me naked”. I swear that man must have had the patience of Job because I don’t remember him ever complaining about it. The only thing he said is “if we ever break up and I found out you rode anyone else’s dick I’m going to be really mad”. I assured him he had nothing to worry about because a) we were never going to break up and b) I was never going to do it ever. Good thing I’m not a betting woman because I would have lost my shorts on that one.
All praises due, I eventually grew up and grew out of my aversion to woman on top. But it wasn’t without help. See the next man I was involved with had no patience for the stock “I don’t do that” answer I gave anytime he tried to get me to do anything other than lie there and take it. If I wanted a pass on a sex act I had to make a case for it. And after he shot me down on all my objections to getting in the saddle, he proceeded to give me a crash course, which basically consisted of the following tips:
1. The way you move
Whether you slowly rock your hips slowly back and forth, lift yourself up and lower back down, or grind on his joint in small circles, you need to find your rhythm and work it.
2. Help helps
While part of the beauty of dick surfing is the feeling of being in control, many women shun it for that very reason. Letting the man take hold of your hips and ass and gently (or roughly if that’s what you’re into) pull and push you according to his whim is a win for everybody.
4. Change the angle to achieve your desired result
If you sit up straight, you get a deeper, fuller feel. But this can be uncomfortable if you
win the cock lottery are working with a man who is blessed in both the length and girth departments. Squeeze your legs together and you can grip his lovestick tighter – great for my ladies who are desperate and are dealing with a less than endowed dude. Spreading your legs lets him go deeper. And of course if you don’t know that leaning back lets him hit the money spot, you probably shouldn’t be on this blog.
3. Turn around
Reverse cowgirl is a win. That’s all there is to say about that.
At the end of the crash course there was a practical exam. Which I passed with flying colours.
Actually – now that I think about it, there was one time that I lifted my ban on dick riding with my first love. We were in that phase where one person wants to get back together and the other is not quite convinced. You guys know how that goes. So I had to climb up there and jump for joy until each one of his doubts was vanquished. And of course once we got back together I never did it again.
Anyway, I have to admit though that although I’ve been thoroughly schooled on how to ride the beat like a motherf*cking freak, I rarely do it. If I’m going to ride your Pony Express, you must be either Mr. Max,
extremely persistent or someone I’m trying to dazzle. I know I know – the shame of it! But as much as I’d like to be an equal-opportunity sausage straddler, I’m lazy I have bad knees and I need to save that for my VIP customers but only the ones who ask for it. I don’t offer it up gratuitously.
For the longest time I thought I was the only woman who was choosy about pogo sticking, but in researching this post I encountered quite a few women who either don’t do it or relegate it to special occasion status. So tell me readers – how do you feel about woman on top? Ladies where does this rank among your preferred positions? Are you stingy with it or do you give it freely? Do you have tips to share? Men – are there any of you who don’t enjoy this?
Because if so I want to sleep with you. Overshare with me in the comments.