One of the things most bloggers will say about themselves is that they find it easiest to express themselves through words. For
mere mortals other people, it’s easier to show their feelings through action or affection. Then you have the people – my daddy is one of these – who express themselves best through gifts.
But no matter if we are a talker, a doer, or a giver, the fact is that some words and phrases are more difficult to roll off the tongue than others. So today we’re talking about what I think are the most difficult things for most of us to say.
It seems like for most people, I’m sorry is the hardest thing to say. People have all kinds of hangups and rules about it. Some people refuse to apologize if they don’t feel they’ve done anything wrong; even if what they’ve done has hurt someone they love. Some people won’t apologize if they’re asked to; even if they know they’re wrong and they are in fact sorry. I see people all the time keeping a tighter grip on their apologies than they do on their wallets.
Personally, I’ve never had a problem with saying I’m sorry. Even if I don’t think I’m wrong, I recognize the value in apologizing for hurting someone, even if I’m not sorry for the act itself. In fact – and here’s a word to the wise in case any of you might end up in a relationship with me one day – when I’m in a relationship, I view apologies as the currency with which I buy peace and quiet. Which is not to say that my apologies are insincere, just that I’m quicker to give them up than other people might be. I figure the sooner I say sorry and pat down his feathers, the quicker I can get back to my book.
I love you
For most people it seems saying I love you is a grave and monumental thing. People have rules and timelines for when it’s okay to say it and who should say it first. To which I say hey – whatever works.
Personally I’m…I don’t want to say I’m indiscriminate with this word, but I’m definitely generous with it and I’ll tell you why. When I was in my twenties, a very good friend of mine passed away suddenly. And without getting too morbid about it, when I was looking at him at his wake I suddenly realized that – although I did love him very much – I’d never told him that I loved him.
What I took from that experience is that the people I love will always know that I love them. Whether they say it back or not, whether I express it with words or
sex actions, I try to be free with my affection.
I miss you
Now see here is where things start to go left for me. I’m not sure how other people view this, but for me there is no phrase in the English language more difficult to utter than this. To me, saying I miss you is like exposing my soft little underbelly and waiting for you to plunge a knife in it.
I don’t really know how or why I developed this aversion to saying I miss you, but I do know that for a long time I just refused to say it to people. I was probably in my 30’s when I lifted my ban on it, and even now it’s pretty rare to hear me say it; even if the other person says it first. I’m much more likely to say something like “I feel like I haven’t talked to you in centuries” or “I haven’t seen you since Jesus was a wee boy” than to come out and admit that I miss you.
So what about you guys, are you talkers, doers, or givers? What words do you find difficult to say? I dragged myself out of bed with a migraine to write this, so share with me in the comments please.