There’s No Place Like Home
As I’m sure you’re all aware by now, I’m on vacation. It’s a great thing in so many ways not the least of which is that it has allowed me to restore the sexy tan lines that were beginning to fade but in other ways being away from home is killing me dead. See all [...]
As I’m sure you’re all aware by now, I’m on vacation. It’s a great thing in so many ways
not the least of which is that it has allowed me to restore the sexy tan lines that were beginning to fade but in other ways being away from home is killing me dead. See all the time I was planning this trip I was so busy looking forward to the things I would be doing, I never stopped to think of the things I wouldn’t be able to do.
Five days into my trip, I’m having a great time. I’ve lounged by the pool, frolicked in the ocean, and
spent qualitiy time with the jets in enjoyed the hot tub. I finally got to meet most of my twitterwives in person and spend time with family I haven’t seen in a long time. I haven’t talked on the phone for more than 30 seconds in days and I’ve forgotten all about my job. I’m just about in hog heaven.
The trouble is though that I’m really homesick. Which is weird because if I was home I’d probably be complaining about work and wishing I was on vacation. But as great as a holiday is, there are some slightly random things I really miss about home. Such as….
1. Bathing accoutrements
I didn’t bring body wash with me on my trip because I knew that wherever I was it would be provided for me. And since I’ve never been all that particular about what body wash I use, I didn’t think it would be a big deal. But every shower I’ve taken this week (and there have been a lot of showers because it’s frigging boiling here) has been slightly less than satisfying because I miss the smell of my own body wash. I also miss my exfoliating gloves; which I always use in the shower. It’s an oddly bizarre feeling to bathe without them.
3. Painting my nails
I have so rarely been alone since I’ve been here that I haven’t had time to deal with my nails. Shit is starting to get really raggedy. And I know you all know what the eff I mean by that.
5. Real reading
Similar to the nail painting, I haven’t had enough alone time to read the way I’m used to reading. I’m grabbing snatches of books here and there but I haven’t had a good, long, hard read since last Tuesday. I have, however, watched more television this week than I’ve watched this year which is just wrong in so many ways. I can’t wait to go home and go apeshit on a book.
6. Having someone butter my bagels for me
My eating habits don’t change on vacation so I have eaten an obscene amount of bagels since I’ve been here. And with the exception of the greatest place on earth, no one here butters a bagel for you. What you get instead is a rapidly-cooling bagel tossed carelessly into a bag with a knife and some cold-ass butter (I’m not even going to get into how unholy it is to me to have the bagel, knife, and butter packets in the same bag). By the time I organize myself the bagel is cold and torn up as a result of my attempts to schmear rock-hard butter on it. It’s so uncivilized. Say what you will about Canadians, we don’t have to butter our own bagels if we’re ordering them from a restaurant. That’s the way it should be.
3. Doing with the fuck I want
You guys know me – I’m a lone wolf. At home I do what I want when want, run nothing by anyone, and who don’t like it could lump it. A vacation that involves friends and family means that at best, I have to tell someone before I just saunter off somewhere and at worst I have to wait around for someone to take me where I want to go. This is a kind of death to me.
5. My beloved iphone
Let me tell you something: roaming is a bitch. And I’ve learned the hard way that it will assrape you right out of your post-vacation bliss if you’re not careful so on this trip my phone is strictly in airplane mode. This means I can do nothing but play Tetris and search for wi-fi on it. Under normal circumstances I do everything from track my cycle to write my blog posts on my phone so this restricted access is hurting my soul.
All in all though my vacation has been great and I’m glad I grew the stones to get on the plane. But please believe that when I get home I will be a showering, data-using, reading, bagel-eating, masturbating fool.
What about you guys? Do you tend to get homesick when you travel or are you just glad to be away? Share with me in the comments.